Guide to Overcoming Anger and Stop Being Vengeful

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Anger is a normal feeling, and one of the many emotions humans feel. In some circumstances, it can be motivational and motivate people to get things done. But it can be troublesome when it leads to aggressive behavior, abuse, or physical harm. People say that words are spoken, and actions are done in anger often leave you in regret. This is one of the many reasons why controlling anger is essential.

Not realizing the importance of anger management and relying on the practice of “just letting it out” every time you’re angry may only make things worse. There have been many instances in the past that proves that letting your anger out on someone or something has led to life-long regret and great loss. People often fall into the pit of crimes which start from the bottom on the intensity of the scale and reach to the top in no time.

A very famous story, The Cask of Amontillado, shows the anger of a man who slips into a heinous crime by murdering a fellow man after being insulted. Being insulted infuriated him, and he had an urge to take revenge for the humiliation. The state of being angry can alter one’s thinking process, and they are unable to think clearly and rationally. With no concerns about the consequences of their actions, they take revenge, which often leads to life-long regrets and trauma.

Many people have researched this story and extracted different behavioral changes from the characters. Several research papers refer to this story and use the central plot to depict a person’s neurological behavior and the urge to get revenge. StudyMoose has published many essays and sample essay questions that can help you understand the importance of anger management and controlling feelings and emotions.

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Sometimes, it is not easy to control anger; however, certain practices can help you remain calm when you feel yourself getting mad. Different people have different ways of letting out. Some can be extremely aggressive, while some people choose to stay quiet. People who are aware that they burst out in anger and have a harsh behavior should try to overcome it. Consulting a therapist and psychiatrist is a standard solution for most. But if you want some quick and easy hacks, here are some ways you can stop being angry and control your reaction:

Take deep breaths

Your breathing becomes speedy and frequent when you are angry. Reversing this process can help calm you down. Taking deep and slow breaths can calm your nerves and help you be more relaxed.

Letting it out is not the solution

You must have been told that venting out your anger is an efficient solution. While it’s true for the short run, in the long run, it can have a negative impact on your mental health. People that have a habit of taking their anger out through physical activity, such as punching things, need to be extra careful not to harm themselves or those around them.

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Stop talking

As mentioned earlier in this article, some people choose to stay quiet in anger. However, those that let anger out should also practice staying quiet. It may be very hard in the beginning, but eventually, it might end up saving a relationship. These moments of silence will earn you some time to think the situation through and calm down.

Take time out

Staying away from people for a while is a good option too. It can help you think about the whole situation in peace and restructure your emotions.

Keep a journal

Making a routine of writing anything that upsets you in a journal can help decrease the number of times you get angry. When you are aware that your anger might escalate, you can sit and write it down in a journal. This is one healthy way to vent it out.

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Talk it out

You can always sit with a friend or a family member and share what you’re going through with them. Sharing your anger with someone can lead to practical solutions. Also, it will always put your heart at peace.


When you get angry, you can reassess the situation. It’s essential to practice empathy and keep into consideration that the person you’re angry at may be dealing with something very serious. Maybe their pet died, or their friend passed away. Thinking about different possibilities and justifying other’s behavior can change your emotions from anger to empathy. When we change the way we think, we change the way we feel. Reappraisal can shift the negative energy you feel when you’re angry into positive energy, changing the mood entirely.

Getting professional help

Seeking help and counseling is never a bad idea. Your therapist can tell you how to get rid of anger issues based on your personal behavior and situation. They can assess your life and personality and suggest ways to help you get rid of your anger and control your emotions.

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Your anger doesn’t only affect you, but it can also hurt the people around you. Such reactions can alter your relationship with many people, and you may do something you never meant to do. In every society or religion, controlling one’s anger is a trait that is valued. Your own happiness and the happiness of those around you is often based on how you react to situations. It’s important to remember that anger is a very normal emotion that comes from time to time. The problem is not getting angry. It’s the way you let it out and react to it that can be problematic. Hence, managing and controlling anger is very important.